John 15 is my leaving passage.
Whenever I hear of it, I am brought back to the room at Morningstar and asking myself "what are my "GOOD" idols-- the things that need to be removed in order to develop a true understanding of trust.
We left.
It's hard.
But, it's good, too.
We were told to wait and sit still.
For one year.
I'm only 3 months in.
I'm not really good at waiting.
One year is a long time-- except when you have a newborn.
But when are anticipating what and when and how and why and who and wow, a year feels like forever.
John 15.
I'm brought back to that room where Jim took the giant pruning shears and snipped 90% of the grape vine off. He was left with a little stick. That's all.
I feel like the little piece of stick today.
And about that vinedresser...
I trust him.
I know it is good.
But, it's hard.
The ridicule and the judgement, the misunderstanding, the whispers, the silent treatment.
Why, oh Lord is this hard?
If we are truly seeking the will of God in this, wouldn't one desire good gifts and a sense of MORE for your kids? Instead of wondering what is wrong with me, can't we celebrate that His Kids are wanting more of HIM?
Identity is a stinker.
If you don't know who your Father is, you will be unfulfilled in your identity.
Who is my Father?
What does he require of me?
And about those grapes...
Only the one year old canes bear fruit in the 2nd year.... is that the year of favor?
If 90% of the vine must be pruned, that feels like an awful lot.
What does my fruit look like?
How will we know?
At the core, it is about love.
Love is all we need.
Love is meant to be given away.
What is this love?
The pruning is the process that proclaims the favor of the Lord in his time.
One year.
I can do this.
Because the fruit is worth it.
