So, we've compromised. I let her use our email address. I have to put up with the odd "LOL" TTYL, sixteen fonts, and eleven different colour emails that show up from all her little buddies, but I think it's safer than online chatting. I can monitor everything that comes through. I am so glad that I monitor this.
A is a very sensitive, soft-hearted kid. She is so concerned with the well-being and feelings of others that she just cannot fathom it when others are not the same. Back to the email thing...
I intercepted an email that went like this:
From A--
Hey! When Is your birthday party?? JC.(Just Checking) TTYL.
Reply--DON'T TAKE THIS PERSONALLY?!?!?!?! I'm sorry, but I took it personally. I deleted the email. I grounded her off email. I grounded her off the computer. I wouldn't let her phone. I was choked!
And then I slept on it.
In the morning, with more clarity, I explained to my uber-sensitive child that some kids don't think about the consequences before they share things. I knew A would be devastated by that response. There were tears. There were many questions. Then we talked strategy.
So, overall, this became a learning opportunity. But, it still stings.
It's really hard not to put your own feelings into something like this. I can remember when so-and-so bugged me about wearing a purple coat to school. Even though Mom bought me a trendy rainbow scarf, it didn't soften the blow. I was scared off purple for years! Dad still bugs me about it. Parents are supposed to protect their kids from hurt. I was so disappointed that I couldn't help her avoid the pain. And yet, it still exists.
Where do we go from here? Not sure. But, we are learning along the way.
